Such A Publicity Stunt

Shameless Italian Celebrity Wanted

2008-08-20T12:29:00.002-04:00

Shameless Italian celebrity wanted for good times and classy fun in his vespa. Must have a glorious mane and indescribable appreciation for scotch.

Who is Marco Santori?

2008-06-08T17:00:00.001-04:00

Marco Santori has a blog!

Paris going to jail = our Christmas

2007-05-08T14:37:00.000-04:00

Although we are still on our break from blogging, and will relaunch officially after our deadly law finals are completed, so we may devote the appropriate time and attention to the entertainment world, we find that it is imperative to touch upon the fact that Christmas has come early to America this year...in the form of Paris Hilton's jail sentence!!!
Paris has started a petition to ask Governor Swarchenegger for a pardon to this "injustice" - you know, breaking a law repeatedly. But such a petition is like asking Santa to take away our Christmas presents and so I say that for the love of all things merry, Paris must serve her assigned 45 days in prison!

I'd make a "ho ho ho" reference but it's too easy.

WTF???????

2007-04-03T11:07:00.000-04:00

I don't watch Ellen, and now I know why. If this is the most exciting sh*t that goes on I'm not missing anything. However, I give her props for making J-Lo look like an idiot. People's caption for the picture calls J-Lo a triple threat - all I can say is, maybe in 2001 she was but now - ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

In other Spice Girl news . . .

2007-04-03T11:02:00.000-04:00

Victoria Beckham should NOT dress like a 13 year old boy. Duh, I know she's skiing and that that's probably not the outfit a 13 year old boy would pick to go skiing, but you can't deny b*tch looks somewhat manly. Probably not manly, per se, but definitely like a very Euro gay dude - highlights, hairband and all.
Here she is on the slopes in Courchevel, France. Shouldn't you be house hunting????????

Scary Spice FINALLY Pops

2007-04-03T10:56:00.000-04:00

Melanie Brown, AKA Scary Spice gave birth to a 5 pound 4 ounce baby girl early Tuesday morning in Santa Monica, California. Is it a coincidence that it's also Eddie Murphy's birthday?
Oooooh I love paternity tests!!!!!!!!!

Should I be really, really sad?

2007-04-03T10:54:00.001-04:00

Pete sings to Kate, Kate kicks him and sings "rot in jail you c**t" . . . this is the most bizarre things I've ever seen. But on some level it's really romantic and cute. Hmm... I clearly have relationship issues. I was watching Pride and Prejudice last night and I think this is almost as romantic as "and how are you this evening Mrs. Darcy, Mrs. Darcy, Mrs. Darcy", if not more, in its own special way. enjoy.

just so you know...

2007-04-03T01:30:00.001-04:00

"Blades of Glory" ROCKED my world!!!! Honestly, usually when I watch a Will Ferrell kind of movie (or anyone from "the laugh pack") such as "Anchorman," "Dodgeball," "40 Yr Old Virgin," etc etc, it takes me a few times of seeing the movie to really love it. I like it at first and then the jokes grow on me. This movie, however, made me almost piss my pants on the first viewing. My friends and I then spent the next few hours reminiscing about the great parts of the movie - which was every part.What was truly great was that there was absolutely no lag time. Even with the love interest, they kept the romantic parts to a minimum and brushed past them long enough to appease those people looking for a the guy to get the girl. Those people suck, but they do exist.Furthermore, this was an INCREDIBLY well cast film. I haven't liked one thing Jon Heder has done since "Napoleon Dynamite" (I think he only did 2 things since, but whatever) but I really did enjoy his performance. It must be hard to go up against Will Ferrell in anything, but he held his own. I adore Amy Poehler and Will Arnett so that rocked. Getting the guy who played Coach on that late 80's / early 90's show, "Coach," to play Coach in this movie was quite clever. And as for the love interest, Jenna Fischer, well...I dont care for her so much but they could have picked a much more annoying actress to play the part and I know that Jenna does have a big following since she's on "The Office" (which I do not watch and people hate me for it).
But my favorite actor in the film was by far, my man, Romany Malco - aka Conrad from "Weeds." I love him in everything I've seen him in (which so far only also includes "40 yr old Virgin") but seeing him in this film, not playing a big strong man but rather a gay choreographer, made my week. Thank you Romany. Thank you casting directors. Thank you "Blades of Glory."GO SEE IT!

ps: I wrote movie reviews for my college newspaper, so I obviously have a lot of credibility to decide which films you should or should not see.

brit brit brit

2007-04-03T01:24:00.000-04:00

I know I know, beggars can't be choosers. However, I'd like to know who, particularly if they are famous, goes out dressed like this. I dont care if you're going to a Lakers game, you do not get decked out in ALL their gear...with matching sunglasses and wig scrunchie!

Furthermore, you can see under her wig that her real hair starting to grow back. She should ditch the beat ass plastic she wears over her head right now and go with a very cute Mia Farrow-esque pixie do instead. When Kylie Minogue did it a while back, it looked great and fresh. Granted, Kylie went through chemo while Brit had a drug-fueled mental breakdown and shaved her head. Same difference.

?Celebrity? Verbal Vomit of the Day

2007-04-03T01:17:00.000-04:00

"I'm really kind of crazy and so busy and everything so it's nice to just be spending time with my friends and family and also not having to worry about, you know, calling in and doing the check-in. I'm not really good at that." -Rosario Dawson, talking about being single, @ the Grindhouse premiere in NYC.

The quote isn't really the weird or stupid thing. What gets me is that I could have sworn she and Jason Lewis (HOT) were still together. Apparently they broke up last year but I do not remember such as thing AT ALL. Whatevs, she was too fug for him anyway.

Sadness

2007-04-02T21:25:00.000-04:00

Another season of The Hills is over tonight.
Don't forget to catch it at 10pm on MTV, of course.
Who can ever forget "my answer is, get out of my car."
If there is a season 3, can they PLEASE get jason to come back? please please please???!!!!!!! let's all admit, he's a God compared to the douchebags that are Spencer and Brody.

My favorite celebrity family ever!

2007-04-02T21:20:00.000-04:00

I LOVE the stefani-rossdales. Kingston is adorable!
Here he is after his baptism at an L.A. church yesterday. Congrats Kingston!
What a hot family, I can't get enough of them, always smiling and looking good . . . Ben Affleck and Jen Garner, watch and LEARN.

Snoop and I understand each other

2007-04-02T21:14:00.001-04:00

Another awesome video. I heart Snoop Dogg.I also think Bill O'Reilly is a motherf*cking prick. Love it.

The Most Boring Couple Award goes to . . .

2007-04-02T21:11:00.000-04:00

. . . Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson, even though she is wearing my dress.
I feel like you guys deserve this honor. Nobody cares about you two. Even if you are dining at The Ivy.

Two hot bitches

2007-04-02T21:05:00.000-04:00

Since I saw The Departed for the first time, I have developed a love and admiration for Leo that borders on strange and wrong. I feel the same way towards Knut, the newborn polar bear at the Berlin Zoo. Knut's mom wouldn't accept him and he is being raised by a human. He is the cutest polar bear baby I've ever seen.
Here are my two loves together on the cover of Vanity Fair's green issue. I can't decide who I'd rather take home with me.

What happened to the good old days?

2007-04-02T21:02:00.000-04:00

Remember hot Beyonce? It's been so long that I didn't even bother with trying to find a picture to remind you. But here is Beyonce now. Honestly, I'd rather stare at Courtney Love playing with her stomach like it's dough.

Her life is sad

2007-04-02T17:53:00.001-04:00

How is this funny? All it shows us is that you have NOTHING to do with your time after Ryan Reynolds dumped you ass (ok, I don't know who dumped whom but I like to believe it was him).

Barf

2007-04-01T17:42:00.000-04:00

I have never considered Jessica Simpson a style icon like some (deranged) people do. But today she just looks like an Orthodox Cardozo law student whose fashion sense has gone out the window with the fast approach of finals. And what's up with her hair? There is nothing about the picture above that I can comment positively on. From the suitcases to the boyfriend, ew ew ew ew.

This is what I want for Christmas.

2007-04-01T17:39:00.000-04:00

Every other blog has mean things to say about Cameron Diaz. Does she sometimes look really weird? Yeah. Is she sometimes REALLY annoying? Yes. Does she sound really dumb most of the time? Yeah. But at the end of the day, she is quite cute.
As for the title, yeah, I want her abs/stomach for Christmas. And unfortunately, although Christmas is more than 8 months away, no amount of diet, exercise or training will let me achieve this.
Finally, how blue are her eyes? They remind me of the baby Di and I saw are French Roast Saturday during brunch. Let's all admit she's not looking bad at all.

An improved Britney?

2007-04-01T17:35:00.000-04:00

Sort of. If this were any other celebrity, I'd be mean and say, wtf is she wearing the fugliest hat EVER? But for Britney, this is an *improvement* in the accessories department (she awful outft below). She also looks kinda pretty, she should wear this wig more often. I had missed seeing her happy.
Go Britney! I guess? Bah, I'm still on K-Fed's side!

I just threw up in my mouth (again)

2007-04-01T17:27:00.000-04:00

Why does Ms. Love want to gross us out this much? I mean if you don't have it, DON'T flaunt it. I was sooo pro Courtney Love and the new thin look all week! Why, why do I have to be subjected to this nastiness now?
That being said, she can at least pull off a bikini when she's standing up. And I'm in no position to be mean about her. I'm just jealous because I'm stuck in a tiny NYC apartment on a shitty day whereas she's on a beach getting all tan.

Cry me a river

2007-04-01T17:15:00.000-04:00

The Beckhams apparently can't find a house in L.A. to live in. It's like SO hard for them. I mean come on, how long has this been going on? They have been refusing to pay higher prices just because they are famous. I mean, I understand they're pissed but I'm sick of seeing pictures of Posh walking around looking for a place to live. A source tells People that they are "careful with their money." You'd think these hos were poor, especially with Victoria taking on a job recently. She's going to star in a six-part NBC reality show that will coincide with their move to L.A.
I am looking forward to that, I wonder if they'll ever show her eating on the show. Since it's only six episodes, probably not - not enough time would have passed between meals. Having said all of this, I heart Posh and Becks. Check out this old picture of them. Is that something that resembles a booty on Posh????!!!!!! Ahhhh!!!!!!!!! Just kidding, we are talking about the woman who lives on water and edamame.

chaotic no more

2007-03-30T15:50:00.000-04:00

After spending 5 hours finalizing her divorce from my man Kevin, Brit steps out with a fugly hat. Apparently, they decided upon joint custody and Kevin will get $1 Million. That, btw, is total chump-change, esp considering her recent behavior.

Anyhow, that will leave Brit with a bajillion dollars to spend on cheap-looking trashy tacky clothing and accessories. Hurray.

ps: What's up with her face? It looks weird. I know she's wearing blue contact lenses but her nose and general face shape looks weird. Or maybe I've just become used to examining her like a species of scientific wonder. ::Shrugs::

more more more

2007-03-30T15:45:00.000-04:00

Courtney debuted another swimsuit on her new body today.

Bleh, now that we have another view, I think she looks sickly and it really looks like she got skinny to fast and unhealthily. She's saggy and very much not toned (im not one to talk, but I'm also not a millionaire with oodles of free time at my hands). Her arms and shoulders are oddly large for the rest of her frame and she seems to have a concave hole between her breasts (a la Nicole Richie). Also, are those scars on belly?

Wow, I'm a bitch.

One more comment: Who the hell wears so much jewelry in the ocean??

twilight zone

2007-03-30T12:51:00.000-04:00

Jesus, what the hell is going on? A skinny Courtney Love? WTF? OMG!

Please please please Courtney do not go all Nicole Richie on us b/c you're looking a bit scary in the first pic. And consider toning your legs (esp considering those saggy knees in pic 2).

I know I know, beggars can't be choosers. I'm just saying.

Halle Berry's Secret Admirer

2007-03-30T12:39:00.000-04:00

Dear Halle,

I dont care that you tried to kill yourself years ago, before you were really famous, even if Extra, ET, The Insider, People, etc. all love getting their paws on your lame tidbits.

Why do I not give a shit? B/c we gave you an Oscar and you've given us nothing but crap ever since. Plus, you are dating a hottie but assert that you shall never marry again. BORING!

Love,
Your Secret Admirer

poor Salma

2007-03-30T12:33:00.000-04:00

You know, I really dont think that Salma knew what she was getting herself into. Doesn't she realize that even D-list celebs move up the fame ladder when they are engaged, preggers, or divorcing? (The kicker is dying, but that's a different story for a different day).
And since Salma is, I would say, B-list, her pregnancy is a pretty big deal - esp. since no one knew she was seeing anyone and since this is coupled with a surprise engagement AND since her ta-ta's are ginormous to begin with & are growing rapidly.
So, sorry Salma, you're going to have to try harder to look cute (esp with that nest of hair you got goin on) b/c the paps are waiting behind each and every corner, just for you!
Ah the cruel price of fame. Woe is you.

dare i say it

2007-03-30T12:31:00.000-04:00

Even though Nicholas Cage is wearing a lei in Washington D.C. (where he is currently filming the sequel to "National Treasure"), this is probably the more normal and least fugly i have seen him in years. Good job, Nicky!

Barron shat on Donald's face

2007-03-30T12:30:00.000-04:00

either that or someone doesn't know how to properly utilize Hollywood Tans

tisk tisk

genius marketing strategy

2007-03-30T12:29:00.000-04:00

shoutout to K-Rub

as much as i love these two....

2007-03-30T12:22:00.000-04:00

1) ....i really think it's about time for Posh to change her look. gain some weight and SMILE!

2) ....Becks has got to stop letting Posh do his hair - ew yuck yuck!

3) .....give em the old razzle dazzle, razzle dazzle em!

(that last one was just another way of saying "more personality!!!!")

Just when I started to think that Xtina has class and taste...

2007-03-27T23:34:00.000-04:00

The crack wears off and remember that this is the true Xtina.

Sly, you so fly

2007-03-27T23:32:00.000-04:00

Rambo, the golden years. Not a good idea. Is Hollywood on drugs?

Oh right....yup.

Petra Nemcova + James Blunt = DUNZO

2007-03-27T23:28:00.000-04:00

Hottie and Fug broke up. Blah blah blah in February blah blah blah amicably blah blah whatever.

Kevin Federline's Secret Admirer

2007-03-27T23:22:00.000-04:00

Dear Kevin Earl,

I'm sorry no one came to your birthday partay. I would have gone if I didn't have all those backed up shows saved on my DVR. But just know that I appreciate your life and treasure your presence in mine.

Keep up the good work.

Love,
Your Secret Admirer

career advice for Rose McGowan

2007-03-27T23:13:00.000-04:00

Honestly, I know this comparison has been made numerous times before, but I find it truly astounding how much Rose McGowan looks just like Dixie Carter. Like, not really even a "younger version" but truly just looks like her. Bad for Rose; good for Dixie.

Rose

Dixie

Rose

Dixie

So, if I were Rose, and my role in Quentin Tarantino's Grindhouse (pics of her are from its premiere) didn't shoot me to super fame (which is what I'm guessin will happen), I would push every screenwriter, producer, director, and movie house to write/produce/direct/release a biopic on Dixie Carter. Because she would HAVE to be cast as the lead. You know how the Academy of Motion Pictures just loooooves biopics. DO IT ROSIE!!!!

here ye here ye

2007-03-27T23:08:00.000-04:00

Lindsay's legs are once again open for business. She is "dating" again. This is great news for any guy who's planning on going to any hip place anytime in the near/distant future. Read all about it here!
I posted a pic of her attending a premiere of The Tudors today. It's nice to have the resident whore back with her trademark black nails, long chains, and shapeless black outfit. (OMG, that actually describes me perfectly today!)

the catwalk of the dept. of sanitation

2007-03-25T15:52:00.000-04:00

As you probably know, Naomi Campbell just completed her week-long community service duties as punishment for chuckin a phone at her maid's skull. Well, she dazzled her way to work each day, and probably gave the designers she wore, including Marc Jacobs, Proenza Schouler, and Alexander McQueen, more attention than New York fashion week.

DAY 1
DAY 2

DAY 3

DAY 4

DAY 5

work it, girl.

in case you are trying to throw up...

2007-03-25T15:49:00.000-04:00

...here's a pic that should help you with the process.

Between the chest scar, the saggy boobies, and the closeted gay hubby, I am regretting this morning's omelette.

Brit update

2007-03-25T15:47:00.000-04:00

Homegirl has been taking advanced hip-hop classes for a few days now in L.A.
This makes me happy b/c dance classes = choreography = tour/video = album!!!

hey britney!

2007-03-25T15:25:00.000-04:00

Britney has emerged and she is looking healthy-ish and happy-ish. Well, she is looking much better. Below are pics of her leaving a sushi restaurant with friends. That's a big step from the sushi she was having at those strip joints pre-rehab (ew, yucky joke). Above are pics of her going to a hair salon. Yes, you read that correctly- a hair salon. ::Shrugs::

Now, I refuse to get my hopes up about Brit. Yes she is looking better but that does not mean the she is rehabilitated or that the rehabilitation will stick. Nor does it mean that we can sit back and assume/expect her to look good. Remember how cute she looked on Letterman? Or ice-skating in Rockefeller Center later that night? We thought it was safe then, but we were sadly sadly mistaken. I no longer put my heart out there for it to be broken. No more, Brit-Brit!

i hate Bobby Trendy

2007-03-25T15:20:00.000-04:00

Bobby Trendy is an H-list celebrity at best. He is best known as Anna Nicole's decorator on her E! show a few years back. He appeared in 3 episodes at best and accomplished little. He was the worst interior designer I had even seen. His taste is tragic and nauseating. Well, now that Anna's dead and every reporter is dying to get his/her hands on anyone who ever sold Anna a sandwich, he is cashing in on his "Anna connection" and now I have to look at his fug face once again. Cruel world.

Here he is with that dude who played Borat's fat-ass producer. I still think that whats-his-name is too famous to be posing with that piece-of-trash ass-clown, Bobby Trendy.

Joinin the Mac train

2007-03-25T15:13:00.000-04:00

After observing the enormous amount of satisfaction felt by Sar, I too decided to head to the giant Mac store on 5th Ave and purchased myself a MacBook. Verdict? In love.
I was definitely a non-believer and I denounced the Mac trend but I have now seen the light. This machine is genius (and loads of fun too!). Hurray for me.
I leave you with the first pic I took with the nifty Photo Booth feature. The pic features myself as well as Geoffrey, the kind soul who helped me get to know my new friend, the Mac.

ps: I am now ready again to deliver the celeb gossip and news, as there's been a lag (cough cough Sar cough cough) in postings, but we shall not dissapoint.

Tom Cruise is my hero

2007-03-22T11:58:00.000-04:00

actually, no, he's far from that. But I find all the crazy news coming from 'insiders' about Tom and Katie to be fascinating and really amusing.
Apparently Katie Holmes has been calling Victoria Beckham every night and crying about how Tom treats her and how he denies her everything. But wait, Katie's not the only one in the Cruise household that calls the Beckhams! - reportedly, Tom left 18 messages on the Beckham's phone in one day telling them to become Scientologists.

Who knows if this is true and how this got leaked. But I think the Beckhams shouldn't be complaining about the craziness involved in a friendship with Tom Cruise. And maybe Scientology is the right religion for them - Posh really looks like she can belong.

Lindsay has found God

2007-03-22T11:56:00.000-04:00

Yeah so that book right next to her is basically a book of Bible verses, apparently.
I'm kinda loving the blonde Lindsay, and I love how she drives like an 80 year old grandma. Could she possibly move closer to wheel? Lindsay, come back to New York!

Angelina .... again

2007-03-22T11:47:00.001-04:00

So, Hello and People have published pics of the Jolie-Pitt clan and it's new addition - Pax.
Unfortunately, we don't have these pictures to share with you yet, but don't worry, you'll see them soon. In the meantime, enjoy the People cover. Haha, exciting, I know.

I miss Brad. And Shiloh. And Maddox. I kinda don't care about Angie or Zahara.

Angelina .... again

2007-03-22T11:47:00.000-04:00

Lila Grace is my Idol

2007-03-22T11:36:00.000-04:00

So Kate Moss lets Pete play with her daughter. So what? It's not like she's known for her model behaviour. I'm not going to be annoying and bitch about how wrong it is, the sore on his lip, or the cigarette. Like no parent smokes around their child. Everyone just shut up and enjoy the cuteness of Lila Grace.

Another Politician in Drag

2007-03-19T23:13:00.000-04:00

I am sad

2007-03-17T15:13:00.000-04:00

As most of you, Lindsay Lohan has been in New York City all week, going out every night, partying, shopping, etc. And of course, I didn't see her. Did I try? Not really, since I spent every weeknight on the 3rd floor of 55 5th Avenue trying to read cases.
Lindsay dined at Pastis, went shopping at Barneys and the Chanel boutique in Soho, partied at Plumm and Butter. Most of these places are walking distance from where school and my apartment. Boo, when will I get my chance?
Cardozo Law School Lindsay, it IS the place to be, stop wasting your time at all those so-called hot-spots.

Another season of the Simple Life!!! :(

2007-03-16T18:09:00.000-04:00

Yeah, we all knew it was coming but I was in denial for a while - I mean really? Another season of that crap? Camp counselors? E can't be serious.
In other news involving those has-been skank hos, apparently Nicole Richie is engaged to Joel Madden and they are planning to get married soon in Mexico.
Also, Nicole is hooked on Adderall. Oh please, everyone has to shut up because WHO ISN'T??!?!?!?!?!!!!

Are they really celebrities?

2007-03-16T17:59:00.000-04:00

Yeah, I guess they are. I mean I used to like Rachel Bilson, until that awful Zach Braff movie the name of which escapes me at the moment. Then she and Adam Brody broke up and since then, she's just some skinny ho who wears trash bags and walks around with Hayden Christensen.
Are we supposed to believe this guy is straight? I mean either way, I don't care - but he always ends up with these (semi) famous Hollywood it-girls. I smell something fishy (prolly not, he's gay and so probably smells really good) - stop making him go out and take pictures with these girls to convince us he's straight. It's annoying, and we don't care what he is. Blah, what a slow news day.

One less crazy person involved

2007-03-16T17:54:00.000-04:00

Debra Opri is no longer Larry Birkhead's attorney.
She issued the followed statement -
"Larry Birkhead and I have terminated our attorney-client relationship effective immediately."
I'm kinda glad, although we haven't her that much lately, she was really f*ckin' annoying. That being said, I'm counting the days until these idiots reach some settlement. And again, when do we find out how she died? Or do we know already and nobody has bothered informing me? Ahh. This is frustrating.

Someone's looking old...

2007-03-16T17:47:00.000-04:00

Yeah, yeah I know this is not breaking news. But I just felt like pointing out how boring and old George Clooney's been looking lately. What happened to the Sexiest Man Alive? Boo. I'm disappointed. Cut your damn hair and take off your shirt, unless your chest is graying too.

Pax Thien Jolie is adorable

2007-03-16T17:35:00.000-04:00

What can I say about Angelina Jolie? Bitch has taste - this kid is ADORABLE, so cute and shy looking, I hope Maddox doesn't hate him for being the new hot asian in the family. You know sh*t's gonna go down sooner or later.
So, Angelina went and picked up her newly adopted son from a Vietnam orphanage yesterday. Pax apparently cried at first, apparently he didn't even know he was being adopted. Pax, 3 joins Maddox, 5, Zahara 2, and Shiloh, 10 months.

Angelina later told Ho Chi Minh City Law newspaper that she's going to be a stay at home mom and focus on her children. I don't know, I always imagined her bringing home the (turkey) bacon and Brad being a stay at home mom. You know that's gonna end up happening no matter what she says now.

Speaking of Brad, he's still hot. Here he is in Hollywood the day Angie was picking up their new kid.

Kirsten Dunst in 50 years....

2007-03-14T18:29:00.000-04:00

(except not as tan...)

let the fun begin!

2007-03-14T18:25:00.000-04:00

Michael Lohan, Lindsay's daddy dearest, has been released from prison, after being locked up for 2 years. He claims he found god in prison (who hasn't?) and will eventually want to reconcile with his daughter. In reality, we are going to get a whole new dose of Lohan crazy.

I predict (as I am now a certified psychic) that Dina will stab Michael with a butter knife at the Ivy while Lindsay is crying/screaming "You're all cokeheads!" as she scrapes her wrists with a fork and blood flows out of her nose. I cant wait for Fathers Day '07!!!

i am psychic.....and freaked out....

2007-03-14T18:19:00.000-04:00

ok, i am soooooooo freaked out right now. for like over a month i have had this weird intuition that tori spelling was gonna have her baby on my birthday. like..... i very much considered it a really likely possibility. and then on monday night (the 12th), i was talking to my roomie and her friends and telling them that i really thought that tori spelling was gonna pop "tomorrow," the 13th. and they laughed but i was like "im serious, i feel like this was destined since i first chanted 'donna martin graduate!'" - i was truly serious about it - and IT HAPPENED! and now im kind of freaked out by this premonition.

donna martin birthed a baby on my bday. it was fate.

Finally!!!!!!!

2007-03-13T22:09:00.000-04:00

Guess who shares a birthday with Di?
Liam Aaron McDermott does!
Tori Spelling FINALLY had her baby - a 6 pound 6 ounce baby boy, born at the Cedars Sinai Medical Center in L.A.
Di has been waiting for this for WEEKS, I hope she considers it a gift from the celebrity gods.

And in OTHER baby news......

2007-03-13T19:15:00.000-04:00

Larry Birkhead is building a nursery for Dannielynn.
Wtf? Save your money, this is gonna take a while, she may not need a nursery by then.
Also, wasn't there some news a couple of days ago about the medical examiner knowing what killed Anna? Who am I kidding, I really don't care at this point. I'm sick of Anna Nicole news.
This guy looks like the biggest dumbass alive.
Oh, btw - Kimmie thinks Dannielynn should stay with Howard K Stern bc that's what she's used to and because Anna apparently told her he is the father. Yawn. We need bigger, better news.

Ew.

2007-03-13T19:06:00.000-04:00

Tori Spelling is in labor.
I don't even know what to say about this picture. Grossness.
The only good thing about this whole situation is that Tori and her mom are talking, but honestly, I really don't give a sh*t.
p.s. don't stare at the picture for too long, you will for sure throw up in your mouth

Speaking of babies and Angelina....

2007-03-13T18:47:00.000-04:00

Ho's getting another baby soon. Yeah, we knew that - but now it's pretty darn close according to a Vietnamese officer, who said it may just be a few weeks until she gets a 3 1/2 year old boy.
Oh jeez, when is this insanity gonna stop? I mean bravo to her for adopting all these kids but at some point you know that it's gonna be too many kids to take care of, and she's just gonna get sick of them, or Zahara's gonna kill them (the latter seems more likely). Either way, it's not good. You know Maddox isn't gonna be happy about another boy coming in and stealing the spotlight away from him. If I were this new kid I'd be scared...........

Just admit it, already

2007-03-13T18:36:00.000-04:00

When are these two getting married? Because they're getting boring. I mean either release a sex tape, get engaged and show off a huge rock (with all the $$$ he just made with the sale of his clothing company he better get her something CRAZY if/when he does!), or run away and get married somewhere and sell pics to OK! Or better yet, could you please please get pregnant, OMG then he can get Rihanna pregnant too and it would be nuts. You know Beyonce's mom would just give him a beat down. Oh, drama. I am always in search of you.

Shiloh a Movie Star

2007-03-13T18:23:00.000-04:00

Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt will be playing Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett's daughter in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Apparently, the twin babies who were cast for the role sucked and "Brad realized his daughter's happy and mellow disposition made her a quick fix for the role."

Are they making this kid basically pay for room/board in the Jolie-Pitt household? God forbid Angie lets her go through life feeling privileged. She's not even one yet!!!! What the hell?

Happy Birthday Di!!!!!!!!!

2007-03-13T18:10:00.000-04:00

Today is a big, big day everybody. It's my co-blogger Di's 23rd birthday! I know you will all join me in wishing her the VERY best in every aspect of life.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hope all your wishes come true - well, not all of them. I never want to see the day where Justin and Britney get back together!

her ta-ta's are gonna get sooo much bigger

2007-03-09T20:19:00.000-05:00

The super gorgeous Salma Hayak is pregnant and engaged (isn't that convenient?) to uber-billionaire Francois-Henri Pinault.

Pinault is the CEO of luxury goods firm PPR, which owns Gucci and Yves Saint Laurent, as well as a French department store and national music chain. His father, François, is an avid art collector owning more than 2,500 valuable pieces, including Picassos, Miros and work by contemporary artitsts including Damien Hirst. Familiar on both European and American fashion and art circuits, the family fortune is estimated in excess of $7 billion.
daaaammmmmnnnnn......."Businessman, François-Henri Pinault, and his fiancée, Salma Hayek, are happy to announce they are expecting the arrival of their first child," Hayek's rep confirmed in a statement today.

Penelope Cruz must be so jealous right now. I guess their lesbien love affair had to end sometime. I'm just shocked that I haven't heard of this guy, or their relationship sooner. Do I live under a rock?!?! This is Manhatten, for god's sake!

i quiver in disgust

2007-03-09T20:16:00.000-05:00

horizontal strips + two shades of shit + the tired old pigtails + fugtastic face = a waste of m last Lean Cuisine meal

barf barf barf

oh, if i could just be a teensy bit fergalicious.....

2007-03-08T01:13:00.000-05:00

here are six reasons i am going to hit the gym/visit Nicole Richie's doctor:

perfection.

Britney: the gay man's Anna Nicole

2007-03-08T01:07:00.000-05:00

Britney took a break from rehab to wear a shitty wig in a ponytail (honestly, aren't there some super nice wigs out there?!?!) and drink a Coke. This is news, and you love it.

In other Britney news:

-she thinks she is suffering from postpartum depression and doesn't think she needs to be in rehab

-she is pissed that her manager and family for making her go

-this has brought her and KFed's families together

-Timbaland has said he wants to be her friend, hold her hand, and work with her on her next album - he also talks about saving her

-and MOST IMPORTANTLY, Timbaland has said that Justin wants to work with her and help her too!!!! ahhhh! we're almost there....

....they said that the Messiah wont come until all the Jews are in the holy land, but what I think they meant was "when Britney and Justin are back together."

marketing with Lindsay

2007-03-07T18:22:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I figure that these photos taken of Lindsay were taken before she entered rehab. And if not, then I think she should get her money back.
I thought it would be fun to caption each with an advertising tagline, since I think this bitch could sell anything. [Ps: check out the blood up her nose in the 1st pic. That, children, is why limit cocaine use to national holidays.]

The next time a crazy fan is attacking your breasts, make sure your pits smell like flowers and wear "Degree."
The next time some guy splooges in your eye, no need to wink, just use Clear Eyes!

Lindsay Lohan for Joyce Leslie (or Rainbow, Forever 21, Wet Seal...you get it)

Cigarette: 10 cents
Blackberry: $300
Giving Lindsey the clap: soooo priceless

Lindsay cares about world peace, even when she's taking a shit. Donate to the Red Cross.

TrimSpa Baby!

Chopard jewelry: for the classiest of class.

Herpes exists, even under a $2000 dress. Use Trojans.

Katie draws pretty pictures...

2007-03-07T18:19:00.000-05:00

uh oh, Tom can't possibly be happy that his beard is doing something on her own. She is such a fighter for women's rights. Katie Holmes: saving the world, one drawing at a time.

3 words: waste. of. space.

one less unemployed person in the U.S.

2007-03-07T18:14:00.000-05:00

Star Jones has gotten her big break in Hollywood!!!! And by big break, I mean CourtTV. She will host a show that will apparently combine her legal knowledge and background with her Hollywood knowledge and background. Has anyone actually watched CourtTV since the end of the O.J. trial?!?
Honestly, I think law school is hard. And every time I think of giving up, I think to myself "Star Jones did this....I cannot fail at something she actually completed." So, basically, Star Jones is my inspiration. Plus, she's reaaaalllllly hot.

babies of the world, spice up your life!

2007-03-07T02:11:00.000-05:00

Well, Liev and Naomi finally announced their pregnancy...like 5 months in! So, I will take this time to list the other celeb births (and subsequent crazy baby names) that I am eagerly awaiting:

-Scary Spice (Melanie Brown)....so she can prove to Eddie Murphy that he's a stupid prick

-Julia Roberts (I'm guessing a name like Jeremiah or Theodora)

-Baby Spice (Emma Bunton)

-Tori Spelling...meh

-that 16 year old chick from Whale Rider

-Charlotte Church! ahhh

Ok, it's very late so I my brain is locked. If I've missed any, please feel free to mention them in comments.

some dog got the best eat in town for FREE!

2007-03-07T02:05:00.000-05:00

Rachael Ray was bitten by a dog in the dog park of Union Square today. She was trying to stop another dog from attacking her own little pussy of a pup. She was bitten on the leg and treated on the scene by a nurse who was present.

Goddamnit! I live and study a few blocks away from Union Square. In fact, I am in Union Square practically each day. I cannot believe I missed this!!! Tomorrow, if you need me, you may find in sitting in the middle of the Union Sq. dog park, with my camera and autograph book in hand. Omg, so depressed I missed this.....

bedazzled!

2007-03-06T18:29:00.000-05:00

Ok, so blah blah blah, Elizabeth Hurley married her bf of a million years, Arun Nayar in 2 weddings. Here they are going to their wedding dinner in India.

Honestly, I expected more. I thought it would be much more star-studded (Hugh Grant apparently canceled super last minute) and I thought there'd be more pics of like diamond encrusted elephants giving rides to the three tenors under silk tents died in spider monkey blood or something.

Plus, that dress is something you could find in Britney's closet at Promises.

a little Freddie Prinze Jr. Jr.???

2007-03-06T18:20:00.000-05:00

Ok, now, rumors have been circulating that Sarah Michelle Gellar & Freddie Prinze Jr. are going to have that totally long overdue child of their's, based on this picture which features SMG with a fairly overly-bloated belly for someone so tiny. Some think she was just not sucking in for a second, but I believe/pray that this is the little bambino we've been waiting for. And by "we" I mean anyone who understands that a baby puts you back on the publicity radar! Duh!

ps: I have that exact same Vix bathing suit from Bloomingdales that I just bought last month. Of course, when I wear it, it is evident that I'm not pregnant.....just "big boned"....yeah....

Mr. & Mrs. Smith take another walk

2007-03-06T18:17:00.000-05:00

A) Has anyone noticed how Zahara is always eating? And it's always carbs? First chips, then crackers, now Cheerios..... Girlfriend's gonna get chun-ky!
B) Zahara still seems bitchy to me. Share with Shiloh, damnit!
C) OMG, how cute are Shiloh's rosy cheeks and nose???

I dont care if I play favorites. Zahara's got that whole "I'm a survivor" thing going on with her parents. Someone's gotta even the playing field.

fugly or just old?

2007-03-06T18:16:00.000-05:00

ladies and gentlemen: Sharon Stone

Another Politician in Drag

2007-03-06T18:15:00.000-05:00

one of my favorites...

she can use her wig if her mop falls apart....

2007-03-06T18:02:00.000-05:00

Naomi Campbell has just recieved her punishment for throwing her cell phone at her housekeeper. Miss Thang will have to mop floors for 5 days at NY's Sanitation Dept.

JUSTICE!!!

Unfortunately, it wont be the spectacle that we experienced when Boy George had to carry out his punishment of street cleaning last summer. Miss Thang, on the other hand, will be carrying out her punishment indoors.

I hope she throws her mop at a fellow community service worker. Then she might move up to diving into the Hudson to retrieve hypodermic needles. That's where the real excitement is.

?Celebrity? Verbal Vomit of the Day

2007-03-06T00:50:00.000-05:00

"Dean was painting doors until 2 p.m. Only hours before the gala, all the furniture was gathered in the middle of the rooms and not set out. It was sheer madness. It came down to the wire but we pulled it off." -Tori Spelling

Well, isn't that convenient mayhem for the documentation for their show on the Oxygen Network of the opening their own bed & breakfast? Chaos with only seconds to go until thousands of people pile through. What more could go wrong?!? Womp womp...

The B&B was named Chateau La Rue, after Tori's pug, Mimi La Rue. I dont know if I'd stay at an inn named after a fugly dog. I also dont know if I'd stay at an inn where there'd be theme nights with Tori & Dean (as she told People Mag).

Also, Tori totally looks ready to pop - she's due at the end of the month...and better not have the kid on my bday, Mar. 13 - and Dean looks like a sleazy used car salesman.

Boy, I sure do have a lot to say about these two crazy kids, eh?

awwww...yawn....awwwww

2007-03-06T00:29:00.000-05:00

Boring Toby McGuire and his girlfriend, boring Jenn Meyer, took a trip to the beach with their new baby, Ruby. I must say that these pics are incredibly adorable and they really do look happy so I am happy for them.
I must, however, state that I really never understood why babies are allowed to be naked in public, or why that is socially acceptable. Just because Ruby is a baby, doesn't mean she doesnt have a bojina. And bojinas were not meant for the public or for photos (except if you're Britney/Linsay).

how come no one told ME?

2007-03-06T00:03:00.000-05:00

Apparently, two of my most favorite actors have been dating - not secretly - and no one informed me. Somehow, I did not know. I feel used and beaten. Worthless, completely worthless.

For those of you who don't know (and likely do not have good taste in television, these are:

Jeffrey Dean Morgan (one of our Sweet Dreams from a few months ago), and

The goddess known as Mary Louise Parker

So Parker is the star of the wonderful and HIGHly rated show, Weeds (a personal favorite) and Morgan plays her deceased husband on the show (we see him in flashbacks or on home videos). Morgan also played my beloved Denny on Grey's Anatomy (another personal favorite) but Denny died...as did Morgan's other role, which was on Supernatural (not a favorite).

First of all, JDM has to frickin live on the next thing he's on (which I will watch just for him and his ridiculous hotness) and second of all, he has to marry MLP!!!! My dreams would come true!

JDM + MLP = tru luv 4-eva!

Scarlett @ Paris Fasion Week

2007-03-06T00:01:00.000-05:00

Despite what others think, I dont hate it. I think its pretty much what the French would like from their guests...unsupported boobies and corpse makeup.....Tres Mignon!

Growing Pains: Ricky Martin

2007-03-05T23:56:00.000-05:00

grew up to become

most likely not the end to the Anna Nicole saga

2007-03-05T23:41:00.000-05:00

Anna was laid to "rest" on Friday. Unfortunately, both of us were MIA this weekend - Sar was in the country and I was experiencing hot clubs and the Olive Garden on 6th Ave - but here are some highlights from the spectacle that ended up being a lot less eventful than expected:

-The baby-daddies (or 2/5 of them at least) attended, of course, and apparently the media thought it was important to note what they each wore.
-The funeral, which was in the Bahamas, featured 300 guests, including Slash from Guns n Roses...yeah...for real
-pallbearers included former bodyguards as well as Anna's uncrazy lawyer
-
-Anna's mama, Vergie, tried to halt the funeral a few hours before it started by an emergency injunction to the courts, which was denied....so she attended, seeing as it was the place to be in the Bahamas
-When Vergie arrived at the funeral, she recieved a warm Bahamian welcome of boos and down-turned thumbs (in New York, another gesture would have seemed more appropriate - dont you think?)
-After the big memorial, about 30 people were present inside the green tent to watch Anna's casket be lowered to the ground, right next to her Daniel's

Additionally:

-Anna wore a custom-designed pink jeweled gown and a tiara

-Everything in the funeral had a pink theme

-Howard K. Stern delivered a freaky eulogy in which he promised/threatened to "protect" Anna even after death and that he would stop at nothing. The speech ended with some dry ice fog for effect and Howard bellowing "Muahahahahaaaaaa...."

Gwen in 50 years...

2007-03-04T15:52:00.000-05:00

yep...these pics always make me happy....

crazy fun at the apple store

2007-03-02T00:22:00.000-05:00

I just got a new macbook and I am SO excited that I had to write about it. Here's a picture we took at the Apple store of my friends Joey, Rakesh and myself. No, we're not celebrities but since I have the password I get to post whatever I want.
oooooh and new Shiloh pics coming soon!!!!! she's PRECIOUS!

just a question.....

2007-03-01T01:04:00.000-05:00

WHEN THE HELL ARE YOU GONNA POP?!?!?!?!

damn woman!

goosebumps

2007-03-01T00:54:00.000-05:00

These two ladies totally make me hot. Not only are they super talented and have done great movies in the past, but they are also currently on 2 of my favorite shows (Zoey Deschanel on "Weeds" & Chloe Sevigny on "Big Love"). Plus I love their fashion decisions, like here at an Oscars afterparty. Shudder in lust. Mmmmm.....

this photo will haunt me

2007-03-01T00:48:00.000-05:00

skeleton, goddess, whoever, boobies

aka

nicole kidman, meryl streep, mary j. blige, and oprah

baby behind the wheel. cuteness.

2007-03-01T00:41:00.000-05:00

Moses = ridiculously adorable

Gwyneth = better than usually

Hotness

2007-03-01T00:35:00.000-05:00

I think that Michelle Williams' new do is absolutely fantabulous. And Heath looks like a hot ho. These two are totally tied with Maggie Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard for being my favorite young Hollywood couple. I hope their baby girls (Matilda & Ramona respectively) grow up to be best friends and room together at NYU.

I have big dreams.

Richie Cunningham is a grandpa

2007-03-01T00:33:00.000-05:00

This is fairly old news but its so boring, I just kept forgetting to post it. Bryce Dallas Howard and her husband, Whats-His-Face, welcomed a baby a few weeks back. Hurrah Hurrah! Yawn.

Pish-Posh Josh

2007-03-01T00:24:00.000-05:00

I've been meaning to share both this picture and story with you guys. The picture is just really odd b/c I've never been able to understand why hot people like to fug themselves up so badly.

Furthermore, my good friend Andrew was at a club a little while ago and he was outside enjoying a stoge when his girl walked over to another guy (Josh Hartnett) smoking outside and said "Omg you're that guy who makes wack movies!" and Josh Hartnet was very offended and then proceeded to named all these movies he was in like "Black Hawk Down" and was like "How can you call that wack?" He was really defensive and I think its funny.

You know that's gotta hurt considering he used to date Scarlett Johansson, who has been nominated for an Oscar and strikes gold with each role. Oh yeah, and then she did Justin Timberlake.

Burn....

We are family....

2007-03-01T00:20:00.000-05:00

This picture haunts me, because that poor little girl, Danielynn, will be in the custody of one of them. All I gotta say is "slim pickins".....sigh.....

the New York Times could learn a thing or two

2007-03-01T00:12:00.000-05:00

In another immensely classy move, the National Enquirer published this photo, claimed to be the last photograph of Anna Nicole. They later explain that this was a receation based on eye-witness accounts of her body.

The sad thing is, this is not even a big deal. No one seems shocked - it's really just what we'd expect next in this debacle of a drama.

Another Politician in Drag

2007-03-01T00:09:00.000-05:00

hehehe....looks just like a piano teacher i once had. hot.

Oscars rundown

2007-02-26T00:25:00.000-05:00

Ok, we will very likely delve into this deeper tomorrow since we are both tired right now (cant believe how much over time this year's Oscars ran) but lets just skim the surface for a minute, shall we?

Along with Eddie Murphy not winning, we also were pleased that none of the 3 "Dreamgirls" songs won (hurray for Melissa Etheridge!).

We were also really happy about "An Inconvenient Truth" winning! We loooove Al Gore and it was definitely his night!

Hellen Mirron is a fox and recieved what she rightfully deserved, hands down. Same for Forrest Whitaker.

MARTIN SCORSESE IS THE MAN!!!! So happy for him!

Yay for "The Departed"!!!!!!

All in all, we decided that this was the best Oscars we can remember (and we watch carefully each and every year). Ellen was AWESOME! YAY! Very happy!!!!!

LIVE Oscar updates!!!!

2007-02-25T21:26:00.000-05:00

OMG ALAN ARKIN WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I AM SO HAPPY THAT F*CKING EDDIE MURPHY LOST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Poor Marky Mark - it's ok baby, your day will come. At least you didn't lose to that Norbit asshole.
hurrayyyyyyyyyy!